Finding joy in your life is a big part of the plan.
I believe we have set points, but not of happiness, of joy. I know that even in moments of extreme grief I can feel joy. Joy is a pursuit. Joy is either a focus of your attention or not. It’s kind of like being positive, but it’s different.
Joy is different than happiness. Joy is part of our internal compass. You’ve got to find your own inner joy. It’s a big shift, this focus on inner joy and not outer happiness. I cannot control many of the aspects of my life. I am not always happy. But, I am learning to be always joyful.
My recovery focused on a lot of supportive activities and rituals. The Al-anon meetings provided a healthy and spiritual community for me to stay connected. My Al-anon sponsor continued to show up in my life as a guide and cheerleader.
Yes. We deserve to burn brightly. We crave that other flame that will bring additional heat and passion and beauty to our lives. However, without our own flame, we are more likely to be looking for a light. That’s the wrong way to enter into a relationship.
If you meet a partner who is lacking in their ability to communicate, commit, and renew their intentions, you might want to continue along your path in search of a different partner.
"That was amazing. I really loved the way you placed my hands and let me know you were going to come. I'm not worried about my orgasm. I'm happy to keep my fires stoked for the next encounter." Figuring sex out together.
Are you settling in your dating aspirations? Are you in a relationship that feels like a compromise? If your relationship is not heading in the "long-term" direction, in my opinion, it's not worth your time.
Saying YES to God: I am in a big state of universal YES at the moment. And the people around me are responding with YES as well. That's how this happy universe is created. You get what you give. You are surrounded by the energy you are putting out.
I am lovable just as I am. I am lovable with brown hair or grey hair. I am loved at my current weight and even when I'm heavier. I am loved just as I am. I am not sure I believe all of what I just wrote, but I'm on my own journey to get there.
But, when the parter continues to shut down or respond in unhealthy and indifferent ways and refuses to own their side of the problem, it might be time for some serious reconsideration.