Dating is like a gateway drug. You’ve got to “date” in order to find a partner. If you are not clear on what you want in a relationship, dating is going to bring you a lot of people who are not ready, not available, and not very evolved. The goal of dating is to find someone to love.

For some, online dating is the gateway to finding someone who is outside of our normal spheres of influence. The first step is introductions. Then a few dates to see if you’re still compatible. And at some point, you’re going to declare each other as boyfriend and girlfriend. At that point, you are officially dating. Everything up to that is courtship and “hello dates.”

I’ve had success with online dating. I also see much of the online activity as a waste of time. If you’re not going out on “hello dates” you’re really just playing at the idea of dating. Find me somebody to love. Let’s get to a first date and see where things go. We can’t get to relationships unless we are testing and trying things while dating.

We want to keep improving with each dating experience. It takes time. There will be hits and misses along the dating journey. If you have a strategy you can work the dating system quicker to find better matches.

Finding Your Perfect Lover and Long-Term Partner

kissing

Your energy and your vibrancy depend on you being rested and well nourished. Don't burn your candle in the middle and on both ends by pushing yourself with more coffee, more adderall, more stress.

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Mindful Parenting – Returns and Love In the New School Year for Parents and Kids

Interrupting Our Own Storytelling: a 4-Step Path to Mindfulness

Boundaries are constantly changing between you and your commitments. And people with unhealthy, or unarticulated (unknown or misunderstood) boundaries are more at risk of losing their daily momentum to the will and requests of everyone around them.

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Supporting Your Disappointment: BRAVING In the Arena of Love

i cannot rescue you

When I have done something to disappoint you I will be sad and sorry myself, but it's likely that the opportunity for healing is just below the surface of my triggering action.

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Your Relationship Coach / Wingman Has Arrived: 9 Wingman Skills

john mcelhenney, life coach, relationship coach, divorce coach

My work is to help women and single moms get strong, healthy, and confident enough to design the relationship of their dreams. It's not always easy. And, we know there are no shortcuts to doing the work on yourself that will put you in the right mindset to attract a kickass partner.

Continue ReadingYour Relationship Coach / Wingman Has Arrived: 9 Wingman Skills