Divorce, once mentioned, is a slippery and difficult journey. As you pull apart the lives you’ve built together, there will be anger, resentment, frustration, and even joy, and ecstasy. But the divorce is hard on everyone. Listen for who needs support and then give your love and attention. Always.
POSITIVE DIVORCE (is a concept, an alignment, an intention I use as I go through life as a single dad.)
Divorce is one of the most disorienting events in my life. Everything was lost. I have made a point of trying to turn the bad points into positive information. I am here support you as best I can to lessen the impact on your children. Divorce is the beginning of a new journey. You can make it better for everyone by paying attention to what matters. Your anger at your ex needs to be handled on your own.
Co-parenting is a cooperative relationship. When one of the partners decides to be uncooperative it changes the dynamics. However, as a positive parent, you can be the bigger partner. Choosing the positive is about every aspect of your life, and your kids are the most important relationship you can manage.
Today I focus on my happy and well-adjusted kids. She's 50% of that parenting team. And while she still holds the loaded gun to my head financially, she's kept her mom-hat and mom-responsibility in the proper ratio.
As my kids grow older more of the divorce and reasons for the divorce will become clear to them. Life is long. Parenting is forever. Love will win out over anger.
I have suffered from depressions since I was 15 when I had my first collapse at a prep school (Phillips Exeter Academy) in New Hampshire. I didn’t know what was happening to me.
My passion for coaching is to guiding single parents through the hardships of divorce, depression, recovery, addiction, and ultimately renewed belief in a future relationship. I can be your coach/wingman/confidant/cheerleader as you grow towards what you want in your life.
I hope that I am not the cold and distant father that I had. I hope that I have done a better job of staying close even under trying circumstances.
Fatherhood Wide Open podcast interviews John McElhenney about becoming the best single dad possible.
My non-depression (or normal) me is a bit more energetic and creative than most people. I get high, yes, but its natural energy (maybe some coffee) and it's what I consider the real me. The undepressed me. Still, you might think I was high if you met me.