My 50-year-old Body: A Love Hate Relationship
My self-acceptance is not quite what I would call self-love, but I really appreciate the term self-care. And by caring for myself I am showing love for parts of myself I have always tried to hide.
Self-care takes many forms. What we know, is most of us do not take enough time off. We drink coffee to fuel our days and interrupt our nights. Self-care is the process of unwinding ourselves from the rat race and giving our bodies and our souls time to recharge, play, and be quiet.
My self-acceptance is not quite what I would call self-love, but I really appreciate the term self-care. And by caring for myself I am showing love for parts of myself I have always tried to hide.
If I had it to do all over again, I'd probably argue with the counselor and my ex-wife and negotiate something a bit more even. You will be advised not to do this. "It's easier for everyone if you just accept this plan, it's been working for families for years."
You can keep playing around on Tinder and the like. Or you can get on with your life and living and engage with people who are equally engaged with their lives. You need someone who's happy and thriving on their own. Who wants a relationship, but only when it's right. You need someone who is not wasting time chatting online with super-attractive partners who are 10-years younger.
How do you self-regulate when you are dating? When things start going REALLY WELL, how do you moderate yourself? If you're a super-sensual person, is it harder for you to say "no" to the intoxicating high of sex and the love hormones?
I had the desire and intention to go the distance with my ex-wife. When I entered the agreement, and we decided to have kids, the deal was sealed for me. And love was never an issue. Compatibility and control could often come up, but I *never* doubted my love for my wife.
Men get a lot of stereotypical flack for not knowing how to be vulnerable and talk about their feelings. And I'd have to say, in our culture, that being a man with feelings can be hard. I'm one of those sensitive guys, and in many situations I've had to learn to toughen up, be hard, unaffected by rage, bullshit, or attacks.
i may never understand the full loss for all of us i may never quit saying i'm sorry even to myself and the cat and dog
Even though it can be difficult at times, continuing my role as a supportive and cooperative partner is in the best interest of my kids. It's really in the best interest for me as well. A happy ex-wife is much better than an angry one.