Relationships take a lot of work. Dating, online dating, and courtship all have one goal, to give us a Relationship to thrive in. It is hard to find a healthy, attractive, and willing partner. When you do, what happens next is the most important part. I work on relationship-building as a skill set. How can I be a better partner? How can I say with this person for life?
I have been in relationships where drinking was more a part of our fabric. I was more of a drinker in college, and I recall many a buzzed afternoon on my roof deck enjoying some summer rum punch. Today, that sounds awful, but it's not because I don't like a buzz every now and then.
I believe that living with anger, creates an angry life. Showing the angry life to your kids is not the lesson you'd prefer to give them. Discharge your anger however you need to do it, but quit firing poison darts at your co-parent. You are liable to hit one of your kids instead.
Maybe this is what women feel all the time. The men are sizing them up as they might size up a meal. I'm hungry, but I'm interested in a woman who stays YES first. THEN I will show her my Tiger.
All I needed was someone to stand in for me, advocate for me, and let me be the sick patient. I could focus on my pain, breathing deeply, and the questions the doctors were asking me. But she was the general-in-charge, and that felt amazing. Mainly, though, she just held my hand and said she loved me.
Get real about your online dating plan: So, dating again really takes a new mindset. Define what is perfect for you, then dial it back by 80% and let the 20% of the unknown be a surprise left for you to discover.
I wrote goodbye letters to my former fiancé. I dug into my feelings and sat there, not really sure what actions to take. So I stayed still. I sat with the feelings. I prayed and meditated. I ate three meals a day and walked in the brutal Texas heat. And I kept going.
You need to get your communications strategy in place. And then if the other person has a different pace or different style you can figure out how to adjust.
Connected sex is what I'm after and what drives my fulfilling feelings. I get closeness from sex. I get relaxation and bonding from sex. And with my wiring (my Love Language is touch) sex or "skin time" is important. But skin time can be cuddling. Or hugging and kissing on the couch.