Be good to yourself. Expect the best. Settle for nothing less than 100%. Sure, there is some flexibility with the nice-to-haves, but zero flex with the must-haves and red flags.
Love is the core skill and core need we all have. Many of us grew up in homes where love was conditional. If you behave this way I will love you. If you go against my wishes, I will exclude you from my love. This is not how love works. Love is universal energy, either you’re tapped into it and give it freely, or you are lacking in love.
- Listening for Desire and Motivation: Crafting Love that Lasts
- Big Love & the Tonic Effect of Being In a Nourishing Relationship
- Defining 5 Love Skills: Moving the Love Languages Into Action
- A Golden Thread Between Lovers: How Do We Disconnect?
- How Do You Radiate? Becoming the Lover You Are Looking For
- Hold the Center in Love: Let’s Reset and Realign on Our Quest
- Becoming the Beloved
- How Are You Showing Up In *Your* Love Life?
- The Three Essential Elements of Love
Once the connection is established and reality-testing routines have been operating for a few weeks, it might be time to give in to the optimism that says YES to everything and anything.
As single parents, I believe, that my kids and my connection to them are more important (just for this short period of time) than my happiness or my new relationship.
I launched The Whole Parent. I proudly put my name on the posts I began writing about learning to cope as a single dad with a less than cooperative co-parent.
Perhaps imagining the right person is facilitated by online dating because we get to see how flexible and adaptive our sense of attraction is. But in reality, the real connections are walking right in front of us, we've just got to be better at saying "hello."
It's the little things that signal to another person how much you care about them. Sure the big things are more important, but it's the little things that get you there.
"You didn't cause it, you can't cure it, and you can't change it." Focus on yourself and what's inside your hula hoop.
What I do best in life is love. And that I have been given a gift for sharing that experience via writing and music, is one of the major wins in my life. This new lease on love is another. May you find what you were looking for. May you find the happiness that comes from within so you can share it with others. The divorce gave me back my joy and freedom and allowed me a second chance to find life-long love.