4 Steps to Recovering Your Loving Self: We Bring Our Own Issues
We've all got issues. Let's own them. Let's take those bastards out and flog them until they no longer flog and confuse us. Own your issues.
Divorce is a cruel storm. If we could see our ex-partners as humans rather than combatants, we could begin to heal the pain. We’re in this together, no matter how it turns out. Humans of Divorce are people who are doing their best in spite of the negative actions of their co-parent.
We've all got issues. Let's own them. Let's take those bastards out and flog them until they no longer flog and confuse us. Own your issues.
I've found it very helpful to remain in the present moment when dating someone new. Try NOT to jump into the future scenarios, the "what ifs" and "what abouts." And when you are thinking that you both want the same thing, do some reality testing.
We've been divorced for over eight years. Our son has just turned 18 and is heading to college next year. We're not really co-parenting, but our kids are doing just fine. And as they grow older, they are seeking a renewed relationship with me.
Some of my depression is sadness at the massive amounts of my kid's lives I'm missing. That's real and that's going to make me sad. I don't have to dwell on it, but when it comes up I feel it, acknowledge it and thank my heart for feeling so strongly.
Welcome to the new adventure called divorce. Today we're going to go over some of the basics, so you know what to expect.
I agreed to be a part-time dad. I learned to focus on my own life and rebuilding my hobbies and passions outside of being a parent or a husband. It has been a difficult journey. I celebrate my kids when I can and as best I can, but a huge portion of their lives was given away when I agreed to less than 50/50 parenting.
I wonder, someday, will they ask how the divorce happened? Will my adult kids want to know who's idea it was to break up our family? These are conversations I could never have with them unless they asked.
Today, three years later, I am happy. Alone. But happy. And I won't pass judgment on her and the boyfriend who has given her strength and steadiness. My daughter likes him. That's enough for me.