My Triad of Destruction and Rebirth #dad #divorce #depression
I have shown my children how to recover from a loss, and become happier, and more intentional in their lives.
I have shown my children how to recover from a loss, and become happier, and more intentional in their lives.
Well, if I’m imagining this next relationship is the LAST ONE, well, that too has its own kind of pressure, that perhaps is just as debilitating as the rushing of the process.
Sure, I believe my ex wants our kids to be healthy and happy. And somewhere she got in her mind that being the PRIMARY PARENT after the divorce was *in the best interest of the children.*
If we can see and seek the balanced parenting approach we might be able to continue that holistic love even as the marriage comes apart.
But it's the kids who stand to lose the most from this imbalanced systemic approach. Dad is more than money. And mom is capable of making just as much money (let's table the fair pay discussion for the moment) as the dad. These old roles no longer fit the educated and compassionate couple. But the road to a good and healthy co-parenting plan is not a well-worn path.
a muse is a near miss. A woman who I can see potential and hope with. A woman that meets some unspoken standards, and fits some magical equation in my heart.
Pay attention to your mind. When the monkey mind jumps into gear, try and find a moment to observe your thinking, as if you are an observer. Then decide: do I want to continue this runaway train of thought, or should I focus on something that I can actually have an effect on?
And then I did something a bit different: I paid attention to how each of my options felt. I noticed I was not really in need of ice cream. I didn't need anything sweet.