Sexual chemistry is something that happens immediately when you meet someone in the real world for the first time. Not all sexual chemistry is a wildfire of "let's get it on." But most of the sexual tension and sexual awareness comes from recognizing your own desire, your own needs, and how you imagine this person fitting in and even pushing the envelope a bit.
The orgasm is great, but in some aspects of making love, the orgasm is limiting my ability to spend that high quality and priceless moments in the embrace of my partner.
If you understand your desire and what you want (both in a partner, in a sexual experience, and in life) you can take clear and intentional actions toward that goal. Your desire is your guide and your fuel. Your path is always towards what you want. Tuning into your desire is step one.
HERE IS THE BOTTOM LINE ON SEX: The entire act of having sex, of sexual foreplay, sexual teasing, sexual arousal, is even MORE FULFILLING than orgasm.