As I continue my quest to be a healthier and happier parent, I can give my kids my own stories. I can share the adventures I've been on. I can hear their stories and not pass judgment. I am glad my daughter trusts me to share all the ways she's diving into the drinking culture.
In the arena of relationship-building, I'm getting bloody, getting high, and getting killed. And I'm ready to get back up and give it another go.
If you understand your desire and what you want (both in a partner, in a sexual experience, and in life) you can take clear and intentional actions toward that goal. Your desire is your guide and your fuel. Your path is always towards what you want. Tuning into your desire is step one.
It's a long and exciting road towards the next romance in my life. The woman who I find has to be ready and energetic enough to keep up with me and my delusions of grandeur. And she will probably have delusions of her own.
While I do think there is value in online dating, I also believe there are problems inherent in the social click-me culture. But let's look at what's great about online dating.
Slowly but surely, with patience and grace, I will be in relationship again. Months from now, a year from now, I hope to be writing you again about "the love of my life." Heck if you don't believe it, how will you ever get there.
That's what we want. Ascendant love. Moving ever higher together. Fearlessly attacking the discord as it arrives unwelcome and unbidden. And we move through it with the other person, knowing they are going to stick around.
Relationships are fun. And now that we have our kids and our independence, we can be more intentional and clear about what we want in our next relationship. It doesn't have to be about marriage, but can be more about learning to love and feel loved again.