Relationships take a lot of work. Dating, online dating, and courtship all have one goal, to give us a Relationship to thrive in. It is hard to find a healthy, attractive, and willing partner. When you do, what happens next is the most important part. I work on relationship-building as a skill set. How can I be a better partner? How can I say with this person for life?
If you want to move your relationship along, stop texting so much. If your partner likes talking on the phone, call them. A phone call is a fairly intimate communication technique, especially compared to dead texting.
We were both hungry for more time, more head pats. And that's a feeling I still ache with as I watch my children sleeping. Even when they are with me, the knowledge and feeling of the coming loss, just a day or so away, is painful.
Sex is a complex dance. We've got to have better communication about it. I'm no fine example. It can be difficult just to say, "Um, can you try this."
I want you to be happy. I want to feel the electrical current connect between us when we are together. I'd love to feel the flush of desire when we make arrangements to take off our clothes together.
The joy of waking up your kids comes from the inner joy you have at being their parent, at supporting their dreams and the beginning of their day. Your energy and daily rhythm are up to you. And your commitment to bring their eyes open in a calm and pleasing manner might just be a gift you give them for life.
I am still in love with my kids and even the woman who brought them. It's evolved into something very different than I planned. And even as I hope for a co-pilot again, there will never be an astronaut who turned herself so completely inside and out to be a family together.
And then I would get a second wind and sprint back to the front of the pack and send another mis-timed missive. Damn. I didn't learn very quickly that this was a running woman, but she wasn't ready to run with me into an "R" relationship.
It's a bit like looking for your tribe. I've been a joy-generator for a long time. And I am looking now for my Joy Tribe. The happy people. The women who glow with something intangible but palpable. I could feel it, but I didn't understand it at first. And then my whimsical exchange with the online dating woman reminded me. It's playfulness, it's banter, is something easy about the flow of information and a building connection.I