In the Birthday Cake of the Present Moment You Have Three Choices

If we can rise above our present distress and the distractions of our disappointments, we can appreciate all the layers of the present moment. It's all cake. It may not all be delicious. But our attitude about the cake colors every one of our present moments. It's our attitude about the cake we're being served that gives us the freedom from suffering.

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Countdown to Ecstasy: I Know You Want Me To Be Happy

The last two relationships, as painful as the endings were, and as devastating as the loneliness was as I confronted being alone again, both taught me valuable lessons. And this is not a silver lining strategy or rationalization.

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Five Reasons to Slow Your Roll when Dating: Sex and Dating

Live some life together, out of the bedroom, and see how the relationship part of the partnership goes. It will become obvious if there are lifestyle or emotional differences. And when you keep the raging hormones at bay you can see this person without the rose-colored glasses.

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Patience, Mindfulness, and the Slow Road to a Healthy Relationship

My movie is undergoing a serious rewrite at the moment. Scenes are being deleted, edited, and new actors are being sought out for both lead and supporting roles. Today, on this amazingly beautiful day (from snow last night to tennis in shorts this afternoon) I'm going to loaf for a bit.

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Mind the Gap: Listening for the Signals from Your Lover

There is no rescue coming for you. I am not a hero. I am a solitary man, sitting in my own pain around the current gap, and I am working like hell (writing, meditating, exercising, coaching, praying) to heal my own troubled heart.

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When Things Go Right, I Mean Really Right: Dating a Single Dad

How do you self-regulate when you are dating? When things start going REALLY WELL, how do you moderate yourself? If you're a super-sensual person, is it harder for you to say "no" to the intoxicating high of sex and the love hormones?

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That Long-Term Relationship You Are Seeking… It’s With Yourself

There is no bridge that's going to make our relationship work again, so my longing necessarily stayed in my own heart. There is no sense in sharing our desires and hopes when the other person is not available. It only makes it hurt worse.

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Starting at Zero: Relationship Basics for the Newly Single

As long as we are getting closer, and we are learning from our relationship mistakes, we can pick ourselves up after a breakup, knowing that we gave 100%. And, more importantly, we are closer and better equipped for the next potential partner that agrees to join us in "the arena."

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