Drinking is not a problem until it begins to affect your relationship. Only you can determine if your alcohol romance is interfering with your partnership. The drinker must want to change, or not. The codependent non-drinker cannot wait around for the drinker to change. The people in relationships with drinkers, need to find their own comfort, their own strength if they choose to remain with the drinker or not.
We bend when the winds swirl around us. We agree to be together and to weather the storm. Covid, in some ways, gave me cover for my silence. Many of us "sensitive" people were struck mute by the ravages and fear of the virus as it closed windows, doors, and opportunities.
May you find peace in your life, love in your relationships, and a sipping tequila that you dip into occasionally.
The parents in Marriage Story tried. And when the mom is unable to read the things she loves about her husband, we see her hot flash of realization as she leaves the mediation without engaging in the process.
I believe the quest for love is a spiritual journey. Either your deliberate and intentional about it, or you are just screwing around.
It is only through constant micro-corrections that we can stay engaged, in love, and connected in your primary intimate relationship. We don't ever get a day off from being compassionate and thoughtful. And when you are well-attached to your lover it becomes easier to make choices that move towards their heart rather than away from their heart.
I believe we cannot heal from our divorce/relationship trauma without getting back into the ring and giving it another go. Only IN RELATIONSHIP can we learn how to be healthy in a relationship.
We've got to learn other ways to celebrate our victories and process our hurts. And by showing up in our own lives in a big way, we demonstrate for our kids how to recover from difficult situations and thrive in spite of the setbacks.
I am a safe confidant who can help you sort out the difficulties you are facing. Let's face them together. Let's put a plan together. Let's talk about it.