If you understand your desire and what you want (both in a partner, in a sexual experience, and in life) you can take clear and intentional actions toward that goal. Your desire is your guide and your fuel. Your path is always towards what you want. Tuning into your desire is step one.
Live some life together, out of the bedroom, and see how the relationship part of the partnership goes. It will become obvious if there are lifestyle or emotional differences. And when you keep the raging hormones at bay you can see this person without the rose-colored glasses.
I can still have those lusty feelings, recognize them for what they are, appreciate the woman who triggered them, and the move on with my life as I am rebuilding it.
It's already sounding snarky to me, but I have to give thanks to the mother of my children for releasing me from a marriage that had grown unbalanced and unhappy.…
Sex is a complex dance. We've got to have better communication about it. I'm no fine example. It can be difficult just to say, "Um, can you try this."