So what are the alternatives to online dating? If I'm not going to browse and click my way into a new relationship, what's it going to take?
But I am also a learning individual. I can adapt and make changes in my plans and trajectories. So while I was thinking I had lost orbit and was shooting away for some new destination. I may have been only slowing to the gravitational pull of this amazing lady, and learning what her fears and passions were as well.
I'm a handful. I'm whimsical. I'm capricious. I have a lot of irons in the fire. And, sure, I demand a woman with a high level of confidence and well-seasoned experience in relationship building. We've got to both be into the evolution of becoming a couple.
At this point in my life, 8 years divorced with two teenage kids, I have a lot of life ahead of me. As I see this woman standing beside me, I see a partner who can join with me in my dreams, who can challenge me in my beliefs and fallacies, and who is solid enough in her own life path that she shares joy and confidence in our potential lives together.
Both Tinder and Bumble repeatedly show the same profiles again. They might rotate in a different profile pic for the 2nd and 3rd time they show you Jason, but it's the same Jason.
When someone is really available they have time, they make time, and they bring their own ideas to the party of planning our journey together.
Dating is simple. Relationships are hard work. Well, they can be hard work, or they can be temporarily effortless. I think that's what we're imagining when we jump back into the dating pool again. We remember the highs of love crushes, the sex, the joy, the "hi, I am soooo glad to see you" feelings that are bantered back and forth when you are establishing a new love relationship.
She doesn't need to force me into a plan. And I don't need to buck against her plan or freak out when it hasn't been put forth. We are indeed already married in every way but two.