I have been employed or working under contract for most of the time since the divorce. And today I'm gearing up to start a new job so that I can get some money, but more importantly so that my kids will get some money. And yes, the dinosaur will be fed and happy in the next month.
The only real work for me, today, is to take care of my own recovery, my own addictive tendencies, my own spiritual, emotional, and physical relationships.
Here's what that looks like. About 2 - 3 times a year, they freeze my bank accounts. I call them. They ask how much money is in the accounts. (As if they don't know.) Then they take 50% of everything I have. And in the course of the next few days, my banks will unfreeze the rest of the money. Effectively, I am left with zero dollars.
I hope my words bring you some comfort no matter what darkness you or a loved one are experiencing. I can't be there for you. Only you can be your own savior.
Finding the balance in our lives requires self-awareness and the discipline, time, and energy to carry out our creative plans.
Nobody wins in a divorce, but we can keep either side from losing if we stay present and positive in the coming months of negotiation and planning.
Why would someone attempt to mess with the relationship between her kids and their father? Still? 13 years later?
If two parents want to co-parent as friends, want to share expenses as co-parents, and want what's best for their kids, WE HAVE GOT TO CHANGE THE SYSTEM.