"I wake up each morning with an 'oh fuck' on my lips. Sometimes I even say it out loud several times as I'm trying to get motivated to make coffee and start the day." Breaking up and depression.
We work the online dating sites and apps, and we seek some more, but we might be seeking someone to fix what's broken inside of us. And guess what? That never goes well.
When I was younger and my parents began to struggle with a long protracted divorce, I begged for Jesus/God to help them stay together. I prayed all the time for my dad to stop killing himself with alcohol and cigarettes.
Let's build better relationships as we pick up the pieces and move forward.
On a good day, I can let that dark thought go. On a bad day, I just want to crawl back in bed and try not to wake up.
I can. I am. And I am learning to be better to myself. I'm good with others. I have compassion, empathy, and support for just about any struggle my friends or family are going through. But when I look at myself and my failures, I'm often harsh and shaming.
And each time I strive towards a lover and a lifetime partner, I open my heart in a new way with a new resolve to be the best partner and lover I can be. Until I find the woman who can push back completely into my love hurricane and match it with a tsunami of their own, I'm going to keep seeking.
If you work on your relationship by sharing what's good and bad and making critical adjustments, you're on your way towards building a lasting relationship. If you or your partner begin looking for emotionally intimate connections with people outside the relationship you need to look at what the problems and opportunities are.