Why Do Ex-Wives Feel Entitled? And Ex-Husbands Feel Victimized?
You can't have kids by yourself. Your partner is just as important. Why would it be different when you no longer live together?
Becoming a single dad was one of the most traumatic events of my life. I did not want the divorce, I fought against the divorce, and ultimately I agreed to collaborative divorce and was taken to the cleaners by an ex who decided to go for the “divorce package” rather than honor our 50/50 shared parenting agreement.
You can't have kids by yourself. Your partner is just as important. Why would it be different when you no longer live together?
However, there's a different type of person out there. I was married to one. I have known of others. And they have a different set of criteria. They have flexibility when it comes to transparency and honesty.
Parenting is a spiritual journey that you enter when your kids are born. The relationships you have as parents may change over time, but your parenting is a huge part of what gives your life meaning. To me, my kids are everything. And to my partner, my love of their kids and their love of my kids, is unfathomable and wonderful when it happens.
In other words, 2 of the 5 people involved in our family system don't drink or smoke pot. That's a start.
Release the relationships that are not meeting your basic conditions of satisfaction. And nourish and build relationships that build warm and fuzzy connections.
My love and influence were dimmed by 70%. It's a shame when this happens to good dads or moms.
Alignment with our hearts and minds is only useful if there is heat to fuel your adventures together. Let's keep the fires burning, while jointly navigating the star maps. Our destination might be unknown, but our partnership gets more solid and joyful with each passing day we spend together.
It's rare when we get the head and the heart to come into sync about another person. Sometimes it's one thing, a serious physical attraction for example, that sets us off, but the other person fails in one of our additional criteria. One thing I'm certain of, I cannot distinguish attraction from an online dating profile.