Relationships take a lot of work. Dating, online dating, and courtship all have one goal, to give us a Relationship to thrive in. It is hard to find a healthy, attractive, and willing partner. When you do, what happens next is the most important part. I work on relationship-building as a skill set. How can I be a better partner? How can I say with this person for life?
It's been a hard journey as a single dad. But out of this wreckage, I hope I can bring the stories and lessons I've learned and continue to share them with others. Dads don't have to lose everything in a divorce.
But at that moment, in the end, I still loved her, still wished it had worked out for us. I still felt the dream we had written for our future. But somewhere along the path, we both turned away from the relationship and towards our previous dysfunctions. I was sad. She was drinking. And we were going out separate ways.
My ex knew I would not sue her for 50/50 custody. She didn't want to lose 50% of the time with her kids. 30% sounded almost palatable. Painful, but well worth the freedom she imagined just ahead, as she headed towards becoming a single mom.
How do we men get away with exiting our responsibilities so easily? How do our women not ask us clearly for what the need, over and over, until they get it? Perhaps most of you do. I was the husband that was always trying to find ways to make my wife happy, rested, and relaxed. I did everything I could.
She has played all her trump cards and she's still not happy. She's remarried and she's still not happy. She might not ever be happy. That's no longer my problem.
This whole article tees men up as potential "dating opportunities." There is NOTHING ABOUT THE RELATIONSHIP in the entire post. It's about the dad's relationship with his kids and their mom.
I hope she's happy. It doesn't seem like that's the case, but what do I know? I only know that she's shirking on her responsibility to be an available parent to my daughter. That's okay, I guess. That's where I step in as an available parent.
I don't think my ex-wife or my ex-girlfriend derived any positive benefits from attacking me. And perhaps, their momentary feeling of superiority and vindictiveness was worth the price. But both these women attacked me and took actions to hurt me and my future prospects.