Re-HUMANising Online Dating
I'm here to meet ONE person, to establish mutual respect and admiration and a monogamous partnership if things go as planned. Easy, right?
Dating is like a gateway drug. You’ve got to “date” in order to find a partner. If you are not clear on what you want in a relationship, dating is going to bring you a lot of people who are not ready, not available, and not very evolved. The goal of dating is to find someone to love.
For some, online dating is the gateway to finding someone who is outside of our normal spheres of influence. The first step is introductions. Then a few dates to see if you’re still compatible. And at some point, you’re going to declare each other as boyfriend and girlfriend. At that point, you are officially dating. Everything up to that is courtship and “hello dates.”
I’ve had success with online dating. I also see much of the online activity as a waste of time. If you’re not going out on “hello dates” you’re really just playing at the idea of dating. Find me somebody to love. Let’s get to a first date and see where things go. We can’t get to relationships unless we are testing and trying things while dating.
We want to keep improving with each dating experience. It takes time. There will be hits and misses along the dating journey. If you have a strategy you can work the dating system quicker to find better matches.
I'm here to meet ONE person, to establish mutual respect and admiration and a monogamous partnership if things go as planned. Easy, right?
Men are animals. Women are less-than-truthful. You might be better served to work on your lifestyle and fitness more than your online dating profile.
Here's the truth: I can't make you happier. I can't give you energy at the end of your work week or workday. I can't feel sensual when the feedback from you is "tired, overwhelmed, frustrated."
I learn something new and vital each time I'm in a long-term relationship.
Don't give up. Just because all of your previous relationships have failed, does not mean that the next date might be The One.
There is no bridge that's going to make our relationship work again, so my longing necessarily stayed in my own heart. There is no sense in sharing our desires and hopes when the other person is not available. It only makes it hurt worse.
Who shows up in my life next is a mystery, but I intend to give 100% of my available attention to her. This is how I do it.
There are plenty of single parents who use their kids to get out of almost every obligation. Even obligations to themselves, for say... exercise, dating, taking responsibility for their own actions. And I have been the dad who apologized for checking his phone when a text dinged while on a date.