As a single parent dating again, things have changed for me over the last eight years. I was so energetic about finding and consummating the relationship. Now, I'm more aware at how sex, and my drive for sex, color the texture and honesty in the relationship.
If you understand your desire and what you want (both in a partner, in a sexual experience, and in life) you can take clear and intentional actions toward that goal. Your desire is your guide and your fuel. Your path is always towards what you want. Tuning into your desire is step one.
I could lose myself again, and miss the disconnects that ultimately derailed both my marriages. And whether I get married again or not, is not even relevant. All I have is this time, this moment, and today I am happily plodding along, in spite of the beauty trap
If you want joyful sex, you explore and ask for a joyful partner. And when the chemistry is ON you can imagine seeking ever deeper levels of connection with this partner.
If you meet a partner who is lacking in their ability to communicate, commit, and renew their intentions, you might want to continue along your path in search of a different partner.
Today I'm not really people watching for attractive young women. I notice the allure and draw of their energy and physical form. No. More I am looking for the energy of life in all its active forms.
Sex is a complex dance. We've got to have better communication about it. I'm no fine example. It can be difficult just to say, "Um, can you try this."