HERE IS THE BOTTOM LINE ON SEX: The entire act of having sex, of sexual foreplay, sexual teasing, sexual arousal, is even MORE FULFILLING than orgasm.
Sure, In online dating we all want to put our best foot forward, and make younger and prettier partners desire us, but if we're all doing that, if we're all being inauthentic... Well, that's part of the problem.
Over time, as adults, we develop coping mechanisms, strategies, action plans, for dealing with our own shit. Either we get pretty good at it, or we don't. When we're not very good at maintaining our own emotional boundaries, things begin to come out sideways.
Here's a quick test you can run at home. While walking around today, your city, your grocery store, your public streets, notice your attraction to other animals, other animals of…
If you want joyful sex, you explore and ask for a joyful partner. And when the chemistry is ON you can imagine seeking ever deeper levels of connection with this partner.
Know what does it for you and being able to show or tell your partner is a key ingredient for evolved sex. As we can let go of traditional SEX as the goal and open up to the full range of erotic experiences, we can expand our pleasure and our sexual vocabularies.
I want you to be happy. I want to feel the electrical current connect between us when we are together. I'd love to feel the flush of desire when we make arrangements to take off our clothes together.
Sex is a complex dance. We've got to have better communication about it. I'm no fine example. It can be difficult just to say, "Um, can you try this."