For the last years of his life, my buddy will do whatever he does as an old dog. I will watch him zigzagging around the back yard and try to remain happy for him rather than sad for him. I will love on him as much as I can. And I'll be aware of how my emotional attachments and complaints are mine alone. He's a dog.
Dads are equal parents. Some dads are deadbeat dads. Some moms are deadbeat moms. Some parents are assholes. Let's not be assholes to each other.
Make things a little bit easier, by being kind and considerate to the other parent in your kids' lives. Love your kids enough to leave your ex in peace.
It's as if Fox News got in the business of divorce, marriage, and relationship advice. You'd better check your sources.
Here's the truth: I can't make you happier. I can't give you energy at the end of your work week or workday. I can't feel sensual when the feedback from you is "tired, overwhelmed, frustrated."
If you don't do the work, you may remain stuck in the past. You may wrestle with the depression and demons of your parent's transgressions and lack of support.
I have a reverence of my moods these days. I am no longer beholden to them. I can love these former lovers and still do nothing to reach out to them. I am pointed in a healthier and happier dream now.
I am here. I am your dad. And I love you just as much now as I did the moment I helped you out of your mom's body. The best of our lives together is ahead of us.