Let your kids go. Let your sons fall down and pick themselves back up. Let your loneliness be filled by someone other than your kids. Let your new partner into the starting lineup.
The loss of my kids as a 30% dad was not my choice. The ongoing bs of resentment and entitlement was not about me. My ex-wife's anger and resentment, here 11-years later, is 100% self-inflicted.
Let go of your anger in any way you can, that does not involve your kids or your ex. And rebuild your best life by focusing on your actions and words. Move forward towards the hope that your kids will be healthy and undamaged by the divorce.
If you end most workdays with a loss of motivation and deep exhaustion, I'd like to invite you to dig deeper and get to the heart of what keeps you there, and what you could begin to change if you knew where you wanted to go.
We can hold on, we can fight/struggle/counsel to make things work. We can sacrifice so many aspects of our lives to try and keep the marriage together. And in this sublimation, we can become separated from our own inner truth, our own listening and responding heart, as we try and compromise and grow and hope for the eventual LOVE we believe will heal us.
I am sorry you’re going through a tough time. Divorce and breakups suck. I am here to give you hope and help you put your plan together for a better life.
She doesn't need to force me into a plan. And I don't need to buck against her plan or freak out when it hasn't been put forth. We are indeed already married in every way but two.
What do you need to cut the tether attaching you to this bag of these BULLSHIT-LIES you keep telling yourself? Write them down. Identify the "little black bastards" pulling you down.