Do you get frustrated when you're not in the highly-functional and kicking-ass zone? I am happiest when I'm in the 6's and 7's. But I'm learning to love myself even when I'm in the 3's.
I am learning to love my HIGH self and my LOW self equally. It's a ninja mind trick, but I can do it.
The trick is breaking the cycle. My little death pony had me on his back and was telling me all kinds of lies about my failures, my upcoming failures, and my ultimate demise as a failure.
I am leaving my feelings alone by choice. I am seeing them as separate from who I am. My feelings are just a part of me. There are many other parts. When I am healthy, I can see the other parts of my life and focus my attention on something other than the feelings.
There is no one here to save you. There is no one who is going to show up and make things better. It’s you, that has to show up. It’s you that has to take action. Now. Today. Everyday.
We're all on this journey alone. No matter how many loving family members or supportive friends are around us, it is our decision that keeps us walking past the open window.
As I was catastrophizing in the last few months, one of the things I was soooo sad about was losing her, losing this wonderful relationship. She gave no indication that she was leaving.