Sure, I believe my ex wants our kids to be healthy and happy. And somewhere she got in her mind that being the PRIMARY PARENT after the divorce was *in the best interest of the children.*
You can't have kids by yourself. Your partner is just as important. Why would it be different when you no longer live together?
A good father would've made a big difference in my life. As a father, I have always strived to be a good father, even when the decisions were not always what I wanted.
If we can see and seek the balanced parenting approach we might be able to continue that holistic love even as the marriage comes apart.
But it's the kids who stand to lose the most from this imbalanced systemic approach. Dad is more than money. And mom is capable of making just as much money (let's table the fair pay discussion for the moment) as the dad. These old roles no longer fit the educated and compassionate couple. But the road to a good and healthy co-parenting plan is not a well-worn path.
Let's get one thing straight, I am. not the victim of a divorce. I am a survivor of a divorce decree that follows the state guidelines and timelines and gives dads 30% of the time with their kids and 100% of the child support.
Each day, we just groove. Watching a movie, cooking dinner, walking her dogs, I am happier together with someone who is holding my hand.
But, dear son, don't say "Sorry," when you are not sorry. Don't make excuses for not picking up the phone call and saying "I can't talk to you right now. Love you."