I am sad sometimes that I no longer have a partner and cheerleader in navigating these difficult times. But that role/relationship ended several years before the marriage did. And now I have two fabulous kids and their mom.
Your best photo causes me to say, "I want to be the one taking these photos of her, I want to be the one making her smile like that."
Nobody wins in a divorce, but we can keep either side from losing if we stay present and positive in the coming months of negotiation and planning.
Why would someone attempt to mess with the relationship between her kids and their father? Still? 13 years later?
Growing together is hard. There will be bumps in the road. Even your perfect partner may appear less evolved and you might be tempted to return to the swiping apps. Don't.
As we become clearer in our boundaries, in what is good for us and what is not good for us, we can make choices more easily. When something doesn't feel good, we're able to say, "NO. This will not work for me."
If two parents want to co-parent as friends, want to share expenses as co-parents, and want what's best for their kids, WE HAVE GOT TO CHANGE THE SYSTEM.
Once I took my own anger out of the communication loop I began to heal and move on to the next stage.