If we can rise above our present distress and the distractions of our disappointments, we can appreciate all the layers of the present moment. It's all cake. It may not all be delicious. But our attitude about the cake colors every one of our present moments. It's our attitude about the cake we're being served that gives us the freedom from suffering.
Also, as the man in the divorce, you have an opportunity to lead the process with grace and empathy. You cannot control how your ex behaves, the only thing you can control is your own response to the challenges ahead.
The more amazing thing about finding love again is when you find the flow of energy and affirmations is easily expressed by both partners. This new connection is stronger and purer than anything I've experienced in my life.