When we get dark and cannot see the way forward, we need people who are reaching out to us, connecting with us, even when we're feeling good and not reaching out to them. We need friends along the path.
Let's get one thing straight, I am. not the victim of a divorce. I am a survivor of a divorce decree that follows the state guidelines and timelines and gives dads 30% of the time with their kids and 100% of the child support.
Once I took my own anger out of the communication loop I began to heal and move on to the next stage.
Pay attention to your mind. When the monkey mind jumps into gear, try and find a moment to observe your thinking, as if you are an observer. Then decide: do I want to continue this runaway train of thought, or should I focus on something that I can actually have an effect on?
I launched The Whole Parent. I proudly put my name on the posts I began writing about learning to cope as a single dad with a less than cooperative co-parent.
What I need is a radical rethink of myself and a full-court press on fitness as a priority in my life.
And then I did something a bit different: I paid attention to how each of my options felt. I noticed I was not really in need of ice cream. I didn't need anything sweet.
She still cannot see how planting discontent on my kids towards me is hurting them more than it's hurting us. She is actively damaging her own relationship with her kids over MONEY.