If we can see and seek the balanced parenting approach we might be able to continue that holistic love even as the marriage comes apart.
Once I took my own anger out of the communication loop I began to heal and move on to the next stage.
Each day, we just groove. Watching a movie, cooking dinner, walking her dogs, I am happier together with someone who is holding my hand.
But, dear son, don't say "Sorry," when you are not sorry. Don't make excuses for not picking up the phone call and saying "I can't talk to you right now. Love you."
So let's make a pact, in our next round of dating "work" I want to commit to pursuing only the clear YES women. Everything else is a distraction. If I am interested in a relationship, that's going to take time, patience, perspective, and the right YES woman.
Love is a journey. Love is not a soul mate who sweeps you off your feet. Love is a bit more like beauty and the beast. We've got flaws, we've got inner dragons, we've got issues, and we STILL LOVE THE OTHER PERSON.
I do rely on Love Languages a lot, but I think we need more than that. We need action and clear commitments to fulfill with our partners. We need to give them the space to miss us. The space to get into their own inner dialogue about dreams and projects. We need to feel our own isolation and how much more vibrant we feel when we are together.
As I learn more about my personal investment in threads, and my reluctance to let go of an elevated connection, I am better able to manage my own interactions, my own energy, and my own decisive disconnection of a golden thread.