You can start on your own. Write about your early childhood traumas. What are the things that hurt you? What things happened with no adult around to give you safety and comfort? Today, your writing and speaking can re-experience this event with a new more holistic experience.
As I continue my quest to be a healthier and happier parent, I can give my kids my own stories. I can share the adventures I've been on. I can hear their stories and not pass judgment. I am glad my daughter trusts me to share all the ways she's diving into the drinking culture.
If she drinks the third glass I begin looking for what I'm going to do that evening when she's fallen asleep. If she asks for water, my mind enters into a different set of fantasies that involve her participation. The real joy is that we've had this discussion.
There have been several times in my life when alcohol played a role in my own avoidance.