If I am genuinely looking for a relationship and not just a date, then my concept of holding out for resonance becomes more critical. I've had a resonant partner once before. I know how that feels and how transformative that can be for both people. Anything less than that is a distraction.
A good father would've made a big difference in my life. As a father, I have always strived to be a good father, even when the decisions were not always what I wanted.
However, there's a different type of person out there. I was married to one. I have known of others. And they have a different set of criteria. They have flexibility when it comes to transparency and honesty.
In other words, 2 of the 5 people involved in our family system don't drink or smoke pot. That's a start.
My love and influence were dimmed by 70%. It's a shame when this happens to good dads or moms.
This Father's Day I will recommit to being the best father I can be. I will strengthen my relationship with my kids whenever possible.
I can offer hope and ideas for navigating the most difficult co-parent behaviors. Divorce is hard on everyone, please don't use your former partner as a target for your rage and frustration.
The narcissist must keep the secret until they die. To apologize would be to admit she was wrong. My ex-wife is a deadbeat mom.