In some twisted way, my ex-wife assumed that she was the better parent and thus more entitled to the child support, the house, and the kids' care and feeding. As a good dad, this was just her assumption. Today, her assumption wound probably be supported by state family law. But, I believe times are changing.
The deadbeat mom uses the custodial system and family law to not only get what she wants but to damage her ex-partner in the process.
She has played all her trump cards and she's still not happy. She's remarried and she's still not happy. She might not ever be happy. That's no longer my problem.
With one phone call, my ex-wife could take the jackboot of the AG's office off my credit and financial life. But why would she do that? In some universe, my ex-wife still feels justified in turning me over to the AG's office for collections.
At some point along the way, I fell behind on my child support payments. I tried to be clear and honest about the situation. I asked for a bit of leeway in how I would repay her. And for whatever reason (I don't think it's healthy or helpful to say what another person is thinking) she felt it was in the best interest of the kids to file our decree with the Attorney General's office.
I did not cause my ex-wife's anger and depression. And I'm not causing it now. And the money is not going to fix it. You can't rub money on a lifetime of depression. Sure, the new car will be nice. And, sure, she and her husband won't have to balance the checkbook as carefully.
Finally, if you're going to agree to a cooperative divorce, make sure you add in a clause about NEVER INVOLVING THE ATTORNEY GENERAL'S OFFICE. EVER.
I have been employed or working under contract for most of the time since the divorce. And today I'm gearing up to start a new job so that I can get some money, but more importantly so that my kids will get some money. And yes, the dinosaur will be fed and happy in the next month.
