Go easy on yourself when you're not at your best. A lot of people are not at their best today. A lot of people never reach 110% velocity. Give thanks that you can get so high on life, and chill out when you fall below the uber-winning beast mode that makes you feel so excited.
If our intention as single parents is to find a long-term relationship, taking down and deleting the online dating apps is the first step towards a victory dance. So, when you are both delighted to find the time to be together, and you are both expressing desire to find more time, you are well on your way towards establishing the trust that anchors an authentic relationship.
I do believe I am enough. I am practicing mindfulness and self-care in a way that encourages my own inner confidence. And, in my real measure of attractiveness, I'm really joyful.
The dragon is your friend. The drama is your weakness. In using this process your blindspots become known dragons and can be tamed and befriended. You can then proceed to walk through life more like a dragon rider.
Perhaps imagining the right person is facilitated by online dating because we get to see how flexible and adaptive our sense of attraction is. But in reality, the real connections are walking right in front of us, we've just got to be better at saying "hello."
There's no time for a relationship initiation. But the game of online dating sure seems more active and more fun up here. And, now that this post is written, I will probably share it with any potential coffee meetups, just to give them the full picture of who I am.
When I do get those few right swipes I imagine a "hello" date that goes well. That's just the beginning. What usually happens, in the case of the women I'm matching with here in NYC, is that certain threads become clear.
I am just where I need to be. I can make better choices when I have a choice. It is important that I plan ahead for my food, exercise, and sleep. It is up to me to be healthier, fitter, and adequately rested.