In the Birthday Cake of the Present Moment You Have Three Choices

If we can rise above our present distress and the distractions of our disappointments, we can appreciate all the layers of the present moment. It's all cake. It may not all be delicious. But our attitude about the cake colors every one of our present moments. It's our attitude about the cake we're being served that gives us the freedom from suffering.

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3 Required Traits for Building a Lasting Relationship

I have approached dating as a process to identify, qualify, and ultimately partner with a single woman. The dating part is essential, but dating is not the goal. Sex is essential, but sex, also, is not the goal. Working to identify and explore a combination of these three factors, is how I am navigating my approach to finding my next long-term relationship.

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A Few Small Repairs: Solving and Celebrating Misconnections in Love

Stay in the moment. When one of you feels a disturbance in the force, speak up. Ask for the repair. Illuminate the differences and the misconnections that occurred. And set some ideas, goals, phrases, that can remind you in the future when I similar situation or disconnection happens.

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4 Steps to Recovering Your Loving Self: We Bring Our Own Issues

We've all got issues. Let's own them. Let's take those bastards out and flog them until they no longer flog and confuse us. Own your issues.

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I Cannot Fix Your Broken Wings, I’m Still Repairing Mine

In a relationship that is not quite right, we (I am) are constantly on guard for things to begin going wrong. And either you work through those issues together or you don't. And if you don't you will be miserable trying to stay together. Better to move on.

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Standing Strong Together: Boundaries and Relationships in the #METOO Era

The dragon is your friend. The drama is your weakness. In using this process your blindspots become known dragons and can be tamed and befriended. You can then proceed to walk through life more like a dragon rider.

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Tapping Into the Sadness Underneath My Recent Losses

When you begin building a relationship, part of what you are envisioning is how the two of you will progress into a full-blown, loving, couple. All the dreams of what life will be like with this person are there for your enjoyment.

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Learning from the Hits and Misses of My Last Relationship

Over time, as adults, we develop coping mechanisms, strategies, action plans, for dealing with our own shit. Either we get pretty good at it, or we don't. When we're not very good at maintaining our own emotional boundaries, things begin to come out sideways.

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