When Divorce Negotiations Start at 70 – 30 Custody, the Kids Lose

When we started down the road of negotiating a cooperative divorce (because it's all about the children) our divorce and parenting plan counselor also suggested 70-30.

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Divorce, Kids, and Money: How Co-parenting and Custody Breakdown Roles

At some point along the way, I fell behind on my child support payments. I tried to be clear and honest about the situation. I asked for a bit of leeway in how I would repay her. And for whatever reason (I don't think it's healthy or helpful to say what another person is thinking) she felt it was in the best interest of the kids to file our decree with the Attorney General's office.

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Displacement: A Single-Parenting Love Story

Here's what that looks like. About 2 - 3 times a year, they freeze my bank accounts. I call them. They ask how much money is in the accounts. (As if they don't know.) Then they take 50% of everything I have. And in the course of the next few days, my banks will unfreeze the rest of the money. Effectively, I am left with zero dollars.

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Why Some Fathers Give Up After Divorce

Yes, kids are expensive, but they should be equally shared as an expense and as a joy. This 70/30 split is bullshit. It's demeaning to fathers. And it's based on a parenting concept from the 50's. Sure it makes it easier on the courts if everyone just goes with the plan. But don't. If you want the time with your kids, fight for it.

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A Dad’s Path After Divorce Is Hard and Lonely

I lost everything in that moment. I lost my fighting spirit. I agreed to the Standard Possession Order (SPO) schedule and I agreed to let my wife be the custodial parent.

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Celebrating Becoming the Positive Divorce Dad

Yes, divorce is hard. Trying to whitewash every single detail of a co-parenting relationship in some fantasy land haze would be of benefit to none of us. I am committed to owning my part in the divorce, always. And I am hopefully clear on my self-awareness when it comes to my own struggles with money, depression, communication breakdowns, and disagreements with my ex-wife.

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