The Soft Return: How *Repair* Works in Relationships

If I believe in a higher plan, if I want to navigate with star maps and not treasure maps, then I can be IN LOVE and AT PEACE even in this painful pause. The pain has a lesson for me. I may learn something new every morning and every evening. I am learning.

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Countdown to Ecstasy: I Know You Want Me To Be Happy

The last two relationships, as painful as the endings were, and as devastating as the loneliness was as I confronted being alone again, both taught me valuable lessons. And this is not a silver lining strategy or rationalization.

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There Is No Rescue Coming For You – Love on the Air Episode 3

We cannot rescue another person. We should not try. We can stand beside them, or just outside the perimeter of their burning building, and let them know we are holding loving-kindness for them. It's painful, to be in the gap. But sometimes, it's just where we are.

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Five Reasons to Slow Your Roll when Dating: Sex and Dating

Live some life together, out of the bedroom, and see how the relationship part of the partnership goes. It will become obvious if there are lifestyle or emotional differences. And when you keep the raging hormones at bay you can see this person without the rose-colored glasses.

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Patience, Mindfulness, and the Slow Road to a Healthy Relationship

My movie is undergoing a serious rewrite at the moment. Scenes are being deleted, edited, and new actors are being sought out for both lead and supporting roles. Today, on this amazingly beautiful day (from snow last night to tennis in shorts this afternoon) I'm going to loaf for a bit.

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Mind the Gap: Listening for the Signals from Your Lover

There is no rescue coming for you. I am not a hero. I am a solitary man, sitting in my own pain around the current gap, and I am working like hell (writing, meditating, exercising, coaching, praying) to heal my own troubled heart.

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When Things Go Right, I Mean Really Right: Dating a Single Dad

How do you self-regulate when you are dating? When things start going REALLY WELL, how do you moderate yourself? If you're a super-sensual person, is it harder for you to say "no" to the intoxicating high of sex and the love hormones?

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What if the Love Is Bigger Than Your Pain? Healing w/in a Big Love

Like a broken arm that heals stronger than before it was broken, what if your big love can come back with more resilience, more compassion, more flexibility when things go dark? That's the plan.

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