When “In the Best Interest of the Children” is Weaponized
If you're going to have kids, I think both parents should agree to co-parent after divorce in the same manner that they agreed to co-parent as partners even before they have children.
Parenting is the biggest adventure you can set in motion. By becoming parents you are agreeing to give a priority to your children, over yourself. The sacrifice of becoming a parent is about making a better life for our kids.
As parents, our relationship may not work out. In divorce, we’ve got an opportunity to remain connected as a cooperative co-parent. Our role as divorced parents is to support our kids with less concern for ourselves or our disappointment in our ex-partner. It is important to leave your anger and frustration behind, and pay attention to your kids and their needs.
If you're going to have kids, I think both parents should agree to co-parent after divorce in the same manner that they agreed to co-parent as partners even before they have children.
I'm not perfect. I don't have the answer to this question of how to be happy all the time. But I am learning to see my emotions, my feelings, as something that are a part of me, but are not all of me. That's my meta-view.
Yes, we're all suffering and struggling to maintain our sanity. And by embracing the positive in our lives, and sharing the energy of our own inner peace and love, we both enhance our happiness and encourage happiness in others.
There is a fine line in relationships between being passive, being assertive, and being aggressive. Even in each of these three energies, you can be kind.
I am sold on lifetime partnerships, done one at a time. When they fail, they fail, but not for my own valiant efforts. Let's be together and explore how we can continue to romance, the care and kindness.
What I am learning this weekend, with my daughter, is that I cannot settle for someone who does not treat me with the love and respect she does. I would hope the same for her, as she moves forward in her life.
Relationships are fun. And now that we have our kids and our independence, we can be more intentional and clear about what we want in our next relationship. It doesn't have to be about marriage, but can be more about learning to love and feel loved again.
Let's take the darkness in our own lives and forge wonderful lives, wonderful relationships, and wonderful children. We can do this. I have done it. I am doing it every single day. You can do it as well.