Anger is a healthy emotion.
When you feel anger, what you do with the excess energy is all-important. Harness your anger to move towards your goals and dreams. Anger at ex-partners, anger at the state of the world, anger at a shitty manager, each is like little charging station to increase your blood pressure. Use that pressure to move your plans forward. Don’t look back in regret. Leave those people in the dust. Anger informs your soul. Listen to what hurts. And then, learn to move forward out of what is making you angry towards things that make you happy.
Suppressed anger leads to health issues, depression, rage, and addiction. By building a healthy response to your anger, you can begin to move your life towards happiness and contentment. Your anger towards someone else is YOUR issue. Let it go. Move onward and upward.
Toxic anger is like drinking poison and hoping it kills the other person. It’s only going to make you sick. Unresolved anger is not good for you or any of the people around you. Let go of your anger. Use anger for good.
When divorce with children is your path be prepared for a lot of highs and lows. You can do it. And your efforts will be rewarded later. Your kids will never know what you went through to stay in their lives, but they will appreciate your presence and loving guidance well into adulthood.
How do you find your community? Can you bring more creative energy to your life path? Do you know what things give you aspirational ideas? How can you begin to celebrate and nurture your own Alive Tribe?
Let go of your anger in any way you can, that does not involve your kids or your ex. And rebuild your best life by focusing on your actions and words. Move forward towards the hope that your kids will be healthy and undamaged by the divorce.
Many men get tossed into the deadbeat dad category by their wives who are looking to score the package, regardless of the dad's parenting skills, their loving availability for their kids, and often discounting the dads even if they are the ones who hold down the emotional and logistical side of the household.
Then as our lives spun into the dark void of micro-alienation and bitterness, and as my ex-wife continued to spit vile at me, I began this journey to become positive about all that I was going through.
The pitch: "Ferris Bueller gets a divorce."
We can hold on, we can fight/struggle/counsel to make things work. We can sacrifice so many aspects of our lives to try and keep the marriage together. And in this sublimation, we can become separated from our own inner truth, our own listening and responding heart, as we try and compromise and grow and hope for the eventual LOVE we believe will heal us.
However, there's a different type of person out there. I was married to one. I have known of others. And they have a different set of criteria. They have flexibility when it comes to transparency and honesty.