FREE 6-Week Bootcamp: Radical Steps to Find Your Man
The CORE Dating Principles were designed to help women or men define their goals, ideals, and road map for their next long-term relationship. This free Bootcamp is organized and facilitated by John McElhenney, author of Single Dad Seeks and The Whole Parent blog. Co-facilitated by one of the women on our team.
- Join our Private Facebook Group (women-only)
Looking for a lifelong partner is essential work. It’s spiritual work. It’s physical and mental work. And when I am alone in my journey, I am not functioning at my highest level. I know this about myself. I have cultivated a joyful dating approach over the 10 years since my divorce. I knew as I was walking out the door, that it was going to take me a long time to find another permanent partner. Of course, there are no guarantees that your partnership will stand the test of time. BUT, this is and always has been my goal.
Long-term Loving Relationship
I’ve made this list so many times it has become an internal dialogue. Or a mantra, if you will, about how I approach life and my journey in it to find a compatible and lasting partnership.
- We are able to express and receive affectionate words, touches, and acts of kindness
- Our trust and integrity is 100% and growing (doubt has mostly become an internal fear)
- Intentions and actions meet up in our desire and ability to make time for each other, for the solo-relationship, even if we both have kids
- Our sexual and spiritual bonds are interwoven
- Our addictions, skeletons, and bad habits are on display and not hidden – and WE are working on it
- Above all else, we consider the WE (our relationship) above all other obligations (scheduling, priorities, helpful behaviors, always seeing our partner in the best possible light)
How To Set Sail for What We Want in a Relationship
Dating apps have their place, but they are not the best option for finding a long-term relationship. What you want to do is find someone who likes doing some of the same hobbies or activities you like to do. (Hiking, tennis, swimming, biking, running) Then when you are thinking of a next date (or when you are in a relationship) there is always an easy offer. “Let’s go hike The Hill of Life this morning.”
- Get clear on your list of must-haves and deal-killers
- Be honest (with yourself and your potential partners) about what you are looking for.
- if you are not looking for a long-term relationship, or if you are looking for friends, say so.
- Work first on yourself and your happiness and contentment.
- A relationship will not make you happy, in fact, you will likely attract another unhappy person if you hit the dating path while still sad or angry about a previous relationship.
- Get out there, you’re most likely going to meet someone who’s compatible by encountering them in the wild (biking group, meetup group, church, a friend’s party).
- Look your best. Get rest. Take care of your skin and hair. And update that wardrobe if you’ve been out of the scene for a while.
Approaching the Relationship/Dating Conversation
I learned early along in my “dating journey” post-divorce that I was not really interested in dating. I wanted a relationship. And I wanted to put time and effort into a relationship that would last. At the first sign during a date or instant message exchange, that this was a “maybe” rather than a “YES!”, it was time for me to move on. Sounds harsh, but listen, I don’t have time to date. I want to relate. If you’re into dating or a casual relationship, I’m out. That’s not my goal. Know your goal. Express your goal clearly to your date. See how the conversation goes.
Announcing a Free 6-week Radical Relationship Journey
Based on the CORE dating skills.
Starting in February, we’re going to begin a free boot camp to help you refine your goals, set intentions, and go out into the dating arena and take active and positive steps towards finding your next long-term relationship.
WEEK 1 – Defining ourselves and our goals
WEEK 2 – An outline of the man we’re looking for
WEEK 3 – What we’re going to do together
WEEK 4 – Dating profiles and offline activities
WEEK 5 – War stories and success stories (group share)
WEEK 6 – Affirmations and Intentions (the road ahead)
To Sign Up for this free Bootcamp to jump into radical action towards finding the next intimate relationship you need to do two things.
- Join our Private Facebook Group (Women Only – Dating Discussion – Facilitated by John)
- Download the privacy agreement and agree to our rules of engagement in the group. (this is a 100% confidential and safe environment)
- Download a free copy of John’s book Single Dad Seeks. (Link provided inside Private Facebook Group.
- Introduce yourself inside the private Facebook group. Say “Hello” with a few details about where you’re from, what your family situation is, and what you are looking to get from this Bootcamp.
That’s it, a free gift from me and my team (there will be a woman moderator for the Facebook group) to help support you in your desire to get the love you deserve. We know it’s a journey that requires commitment, honesty, and stamina. The community we build for this first Bootcamp will become your tribe. You can connect and befriend each other outside the group. We’re here to help you find your community and your next relationship.
See more from The Positive Divorce section:
- 10 Positive Thoughts for You About Your Upcoming Divorce
- A Single Dad Sends His Hope and Greetings from the Other Side
- The Fear of Divorce: Holding On When You Should Let Go
- Divorce, Depression, and My Ex-wife: Humans of Divorce
- Nine Years Into My Divorce: Finding My Single Parenting Superpower
- Father’s Day: Love Fiercely, Because This All Ends
- Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead – Brené Brown